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EDITION #1305 This issue 5¢
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Spike Milligan Has The Last Laugh

Used News Deaths

Tuesday May 25, 2004

Even in death Irish comic genius Spike Milligan managed to have the last laugh. Two years after his death at his home in Sussex, England, the creator of "The Goon Show" has finally got the epitaph he wanted.

A headstone bearing the words "I told you I was ill" has been erected above his grave at St. Thomas's Church in Winchelsea, East Sussex. Sadly for more than two years after his death at the ...

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Did You Know

  • Alexander the Great and Julius Caesar were both epileptic.

  • Canada is an Indian word meaning Big Village.

  • Airports that are at higher altitudes require a longer airstrip due to lower air density.

View More...

Latest Posts

Monday October 15, 2007

Britain has a Millionaire Shoplifter on their Most Wanted List. He dresses in expensive designer clothes and stays at the poshest hotels. But Kevin Castle who hides behind the face of a respectable businessman is a 'Millionaire Shoplifter' who makes £1,000 (over $2000) a day from his crimes.

British police, who are hunting the well-dressed crook with a taste for the good life, have declared hi ...

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Wednesday February 19, 2003

Handel's world famous Messiah, recorded by the London Philharmonic Orchestra, has been given an X rating by an online music store. Apple Computer's online iTunes Music Store marked the baroque composer's masterpiece with the red warning that indicates the content might not be appropriate for young children or others with sensitive tastes. ...

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  • A dime has 118 ridges around the edge, a quarter has 119.

  • A person infected with the SARS virus has a 95% - 98% chance of recovery.

  • An earthquake on December 16, 1811 caused parts of the Mississippi River to flow backwards.

Quips

The Minister unveiled the Church's new donations campaign on Sunday: "I upped my Pledge - Up Yours".

Filed Under: Church Notices


Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and the deterioration of some of the older ones.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • Falling from a Window
    - by Eileen Dowt

  • Peek-a-Boo!
    - by I. C. Hugh

  • My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
    - by I. M. Nutty

  • The Barber of Seville
    - by Aaron Floor

  • How to Feed Elephants
    - by P. Nutts

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

  • If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped them both?

  • You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes. Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same material?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • The 1st indoor 15' pole vault, completed by Cornelius Warmerdam, achieving 15 feet 3/8 inches.

    Saturday February 7, 1942

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • The first Guernsey Cattle Club organizes in New York City.

    Wednesday February 7, 1877

  • Filed Under: → Business & Industry


  • Edward of Caernarion, later Edward II, becomes the 1st Prince of Wales.

    Monday February 7, 1301

  • Filed Under: → Miscellaneous


Events

  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Indecision is like a stepchild. If he does not wash his hands, he is called dirty, if he does, he is wasting water.
    - African Proverb

  • If you refuse to be made straight when you are wet, you will not be made straight when you are dry.
    - African Proverb

  • Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • "Stars & Stripes Weekly", the United States Armed Forces newspaper is first published.

    Friday February 8, 1918

  • Filed Under: → War


  • The United States swears in its 1st female Secretary of Transportation, namely Elizabeth Dole.

    Monday February 7, 1983

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • The 1st appearance of cholera happens in Edinburgh, Scotland.

    Monday February 6, 1832

  • Filed Under: → Medicine


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • Not to know is bad, not to wish to know is worse.
    - African Proverb

  • Where there is no shame, there is no honor.
    - African Proverb

  • If you refuse to be made straight when you are wet, you will not be made straight when you are dry.
    - African Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • When a doctor doctors a doctor does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored, or does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as he wants to doctor?

  • Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"?

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

Filed Under: → Good Question