Yesterday was Friday July 31, 2026
EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
This is day 213 of 2026

Did You Know

  • A dime has 118 ridges around the edge, a quarter has 119.

  • Airports that are at higher altitudes require a longer airstrip due to lower air density.

  • About twenty-five percent of the population will sneeze when they are exposed to light.

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  • Crayola is a French word that means Oily chalk.

  • About twenty-five percent of the population will sneeze when they are exposed to light.

  • Canada is an Indian word meaning Big Village.

Quips

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


The Vicar is on vacation. Massages can be given to the Church Secretary.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • School Meals
    - by R. E. Volting

  • My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
    - by I. M. Nutty

  • Falling from a Window
    - by Eileen Dowt

  • Neck Exercises
    - by G. Rarff

  • How to Feed Elephants
    - by P. Nutts

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • Why do you need a drivers license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

  • If CON is the opposite of PRO, is congress the opposite of progress?

  • Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • The 1st appearance of cholera happens in Edinburgh, Scotland.

    Monday February 6, 1832

  • Filed Under: → Medicine


  • Astronomical Society of Pacific holds its 1st meeting in San Francisco.

    Thursday February 7, 1889

  • Filed Under: → Science


  • The 1st solo England to Australia flight takes off piloted by Bert Hinkler.

    Tuesday February 7, 1928

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


Events

  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Listen or thy tongue will keep thee deaf.
    - American Indian Proverb

  • When elephants fight, it is the grass who suffers.
    - African Proverb

  • It takes a village to raise a child.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • Joe DiMaggio becomes the 1st $100,000 a year baseball player. He plays for the New York Yankees.

    Monday February 7, 1949

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • The United States swears in its 1st female Secretary of Transportation, namely Elizabeth Dole.

    Monday February 7, 1983

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • The 1st appearance of cholera happens in Edinburgh, Scotland.

    Monday February 6, 1832

  • Filed Under: → Medicine


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.
    - African Proverb

  • Until lions have their own historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.
    - African Proverb

  • Indecision is like a stepchild. If he does not wash his hands, he is called dirty, if he does, he is wasting water.
    - African Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes. Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same material?

  • When a doctor doctors a doctor does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored, or does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as he wants to doctor?

  • Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

Filed Under: → Good Question