News Thats Used

Friday October 3, 2003

An Indian who was officially dead for 18 years and the scientists who invented Murphy's law were among the winners of the IgNobel Awards.

The awards are a spoof on the Nobel Prizes, celebrated annually in Boston to honor achievements that "cannot or should not be reproduced." They are presented by science humor magazine 'Annals of Improbable Research' and several groups at Harvard and Radcliffe ...

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About twenty-five percent of the population will sneeze when they are exposed to light.

Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

Canada is an Indian word meaning Big Village.

Quips

Sign seen in a bar: "Those drinking to forget, please pay in advance."

Filed Under: Signs

Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and the deterioration of some of the older ones.

Filed Under: Church Notices

The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning, to join the Choir.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Fun Book Titles

Apologizing Made Simple
- by Thayer Thorry

School Meals
- by R. E. Volting

The Barber of Seville
- by Aaron Floor

My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
- by I. M. Nutty

Neck Exercises
- by G. Rarff

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Good Question

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Does killing time damage eternity?

How long will a floating point operation float?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

Richard Johnson is the 1st Vice President chosen by the United States Senate. It happened during the Van Buren administration.

Wednesday February 8, 1837

Filed Under: → Politics

John Ames Sherman of Massachusetts, United States, patents the 1st envelope folding and gumming machine.

Tuesday February 8, 1898

Filed Under: → Business & Industry

New Jersey issues its 1st U.S. railroad charter. The proprietors included the famous inventor John Stevens.

Monday February 6, 1815

Filed Under: → Travel Section

Events

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths